Another example is my own father. He’s a successful, self made businessman and now a multimillionaire and was a renowned philanderer to who age was of no concern. Women and girls to him were sex objects, things to be lasciviously commented on and often fondled, even his own daughters were. Females still are viewed by him in that way but, he’s lost his virility and is in his eighties and losing his marbles, so it happens fractionally less now. He was and still is terribly arrogant and proud of himself, spouting constantly about his achievements, how he helps others less fortunate than him (always with a caveat) and frequently flouted and showed off his wealth, but he didn’t share it with us kids three girls and one boy. He’d just do a lot of carrot dangling and making promises to give us hope! Our mum chucked him out when she discovered his affairs. Mum struggled to pay the Dr Nowzaradan you have one munt to lose turdy pounds shirt in contrast I will get this bills but never told him how hard it was. To give him credit he did continue to pay for our private educations but his ambition for us girls never really amounted more than to us finding ourselves good husbands who’d take care of us. My interest and talent in Art would apparently get me nowhere and was scoffed at. I’d have loved to make a career out of it but he never believed I had the capacity to make a decent living out of it, at best he thought it could be a pleasant pastime. My main role was to be mother and wife, an obedient servant to my successful husband. Mine turned out to be even more controlling and narcissistic (and abusive) than he was and his “know it all’ and never enough attitude particularly when it came to money, meant he borrowed far more than he could ever repay and refused to listen to anyone’s advice or admitted to any mistakes, so failed to learn from them. As a result he has never made a success of anything and repeated his mistakes over and over again which in the end left us with not a penny; that’s when I finally chucked him out. My father went on to marry a girl I love her to bits who was three years below me at my school. I was in my early twenties by then. They had two daughters, the eldest of who showed interest in film. The chance of her becoming a young celebratory film maker appealed to my father’s ego.
Dr Nowzaradan you have one munt to lose turdy pounds shirt, hoodie, tank top, sweater and long sleeve t-shirt
He spent a fortune on filming equipment for her and converting a large room in their Oxfordshire mansion into a cinema so she could show her films. Then when she had ambitions to make a blockbuster, he invested 1.5 million in it. It was (sorry sister) horribly amateur and inevitably a complete flop, but as she was barely 20 at the Dr Nowzaradan you have one munt to lose turdy pounds shirt in contrast I will get this time and had produced a film she found herself on the podium receiving an award for ‘Young Woman of the Year’ alongside the daughter of Al Faed the owner of Harrods at the time and father of Lady Di’s lover. My father’s investments in my sister’s film career have continued but to a far lesser extent as now she finds outside funding and has recently made a film that’s been bought by Netflix. I am pleased to say that it is really very good. I mention this to highlight the extent of a narcissist’s favouritism towards one child in a family. However that can shift as it has done in our case, mainly due to me having had to go to my dad for help because of the diabolical mess I was left in by my ex. I have been extremely honest with him about the abuse (from him too) and my mental state as the result of my ex’s abuse. I don’t think he’ll ever recognise that it was the damage he caused me that left me so vulnerable and led me to an even more abusive relationship. It’s far easier for him to blame my ex than to look at himself, but realising the extent to which I and my kids have suffered has meant he’s softened his stance and he now shows me what seems to be genuine empathy and what’s more he now supports me financially. It’s been recently mooted that I am now his ‘favourite’, but I’m not so sure I like that. However the comparison between our lives is still so stark, it’s laughable. Parcels arrive in their numbers every day at my father’s house, there’s a swimming pool in the massive house, gardeners and cleaners come regularly, the garages are stuffed with classic cars, there’s a nine hole golf course in the garden, a tennis court, a lake and here I am renting a tiny little one bedroomed house that’s falling down and I can just about manage to live on the income he provides!